Blogging only as a distraction

I am currently watching the Tigers and White Sox and if I don't do something with my hands, I may hurl the remote through our very expensive TV. I guess i could do laundry or something useful, but I'll update instead so that my 4 former readers have something to read later.

I can't believe I haven't been on here since May. Oops. Molly turned 2 on May 24 and is now 2 going on 17. WHERE in the world she gets her attitude and mouth I am sure I have NO idea. The child talks in monologues. Not just paragraphs. You can actually call her on the phone and have a conversation. Whether or not it makes sense is another thing, but you can try.

Me: "Hi baby!"
Her: "MOMMMEEE! What you doing mommy? Mommy? Mommy I on da TEL-FONE!"
Me: "I hear that! What are you doing?"
Her: "Ummmm...MUR-phy....STOOOOPID DOG!!"
Me: "Murphy is a NICE dog. Not a stoopid dog."
Her: "OK. Stoopid dog."
Me: "What did you do with Grandma today?"
Her: "I GO SWIIIIIMING MOMMY!! In da pool! I jump in and get ALL wet!!"
Me: "What else did you do?"
Her: "I GO POOOPY MOMMY!! In da POTTY!! YAAAAAY!"
Me: "That's great! And wh...
Her: "OK Bye"
drops phone on floor.

Lovely.

Potty training is a slow process indeed. I thought I was a supergenius, and would successfully bribe her with M&Ms for any poop or pee pee actually deposited in said potty and not on the floor, in the diaper, in the pull ups, etc. After a few months of limited success, we've lately been doing a lot better with actually going. Last week she would pee or poop and yell "WHAT I GET MOMMY???!!" before she was even off the toilet. She would get to pick an M&M and yell "I get CANNY!!"

This week, she pooped on the potty the other day and I said "YAY Molly!" She says "What I get?" and I said "CANDY!" and she looks at me for a second and goes "No thank you mommy. What ELSE I get?"

She got a sticker. I hope we train fast, or this is going to start costing me some serious bribe products.