I am not going to post all 101 here today. But I think I can come up with that many in the coming weeks.
#101. Trying to put mittens on a toddler who has the attention span of a short-wired eel
#100. SCARF SMELL - the nasty phenomenon that occurs from breathing in your own snot smell when having to wear a scarf over your nose and mouth lest #99 occur...
#99. Your drippy, runny nose instantly freezing into little snotsicles as soon as you set foot outside
#98. Having to get into a freezing cold car that warms up 1 mile before you reach your final destination
#97. MORON MICHIGAN DRIVERS who act like every flake of snow is the first damn one they've EVER seen
#96. Having to wipe up your hardwood and tile floors EVERY day because your husband is incapable of understanding that his size 46 gigundo shoes track in enough snow and slush for the dog to take a bath in
#95. Untangling Christmas lights that you tangled yourself last year because it was so damn cold when you took them down that all you wanted to do was throw them in the box and deal with them next year
#94. Pumping gas in any temperature below 55 degrees
#93. The fact that taking your car to a car wash is rendered pointless 4 seconds after you pull back onto the street and the salt/grime/slush spray re-cakes your vehicle instantaneously
#92. Going from being a very tan white girl to a very very VERY WHITE white girl whose sexy dark hair now looks very goth next to her very white dry flaky skin
#91. The inability to EVER have warm toes, especially in bed
#90. The 45 minutes it takes to get you and your child dressed to go the 10 feet from the front door to the car in the morning, especially when said child thinks that mittens, hats, coats and all other forms of protective, warm clothing are restrictive torture devices that should be removed, hurled or chewed on as promptly as possible
Please, feel free to send me ideas for 89 more things you hate about winter. To any of my readers in warm weather areas who wistfully say "gosh, I WISH it would snow here...snow is so pretty...blah blah blah" and all that other crap that Harry Connick-esque carols have drummed it your brains over the years -- I have one thing to say:
PLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLB :P
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
23 comments:
#100 and 98 are particularly bad.
I would add, having to buy winter gear like boots and snow pants, when you know there's no hope that your kid will fit into them next year.
Also, scraping ice off your car.
Also, high energy prices, so we can't have nice warm cozy houses.
Also, lack of motivation to exercise and tons of high-calorie stuff to eat (although the second part is also nice, depending on how you look at it).
Static.
LOL!! I HATE winter.. hate it, hate it, hate it!
i just blogged about this too...
dry itchy skin, never ever getting warm, wearing coats, gas heating prices, not having a fireplace, having hat head, getting ass-frostbite from stupid leather seats that are so NOT a luxury, sweaters and sweatshirts take up too much room in the closet, so everything is wrinkled, static electricity, fingers getting stuck to the metal mailbox, finally getting warm and some kid / husband gets in bed after apparently swimming in the artic and cuddling up to you, iced over windshields, having to go out in the cold and start your car, not having an ice scraper and having to use a spatula, breaking your only good spatula on your icy windshield, .......
cold mornings: Nothing sucks more than having to leave the comfort of your warm home...especially your warm bed to perform some menial task.
Why do I hate Winter? I can sum it up in one word.... SNOW!!!! I will never understand people who think that it is so beautiful & so wonderful. It does nothing but cause traffic problems, it causes more work for people since they have to clear off their porch, walkway, etc., it cold & wet, & worst of all, IT GETS IN MY WAY!!!! And to all those people who say things like 'It looks so pretty all over the trees and ground!', or 'It's fun to play in!', or 'It's so beautiful to sit in the house and look at!', I have two words for you.... BITE ME!!!!
because it makes you miss summer! because stupid snow makes summer seem further away. because there is no pleasure in wearing 10 layers of clothes not being able to bend or move and still freazing your face off, feeling compeltely anti-sexy and pale with every flaw on your face screaming outloud that its there. and whats up with the people who like rain. its depressing and you it screws up your hair. i mean is it fun not being able to go out because ull get drentched. cuz some people think so. people prefer the cold stinkin rain to the beach they should seek therapy im serious. what feels better than walking around in a skirt and sandels ei? oh ya walking in puddles with some ugly green wellingtons. its true its true some people are messed up in the head. hm what else i can say, i can go on till summer.
How the snowplow always plows you in when you are in a hurry to get somewhere. If you try to drive through the 2 feet of packed snow you get stuck.
knowing that at -10c your hair in your nose freezes.
shovelling the driveway almost every day.
Kids in snowsuits in carseats. The straps always seem to be too tight
Frost on the inside of the windshield because the snow from your boots melts when the heater is on. Every try to scrape the inside of the car windows?
Haha, pumping gas in 55 degree weather? That's t-shirt weather around here. Try pumping gas in -10 weather. And that's not including windchill. It's been consistently -10 average for the past four days in the Twin Cities, and the weather man says we're going to have at least 3 more days of it. I honestly hate winter. This kind of cold breaks things, expensive things. Not to mention all the car accidents.
it got between -30c and -40c for over a month last winter... i live in saskatchewan... don't ever, ever move here.
I hate Winter with passion because it's cold and windy! Also, during winter I miss the sun and I feel down quite often. I wish I could move down South from November til April. I don't know what my ancesters were thinking about when they moved in Canada. They must have been desperate! If I could, I would move without any regrets. Sorry pals... that's how I feel!
I hate watching the sun set at 3PM on a day when it was too cold and icy to do ANYTHING
After 15 yrs in Fla I moved back to MA -I hate the 6 hrs of daylight "allotment" during this bone chilling nasty season. Add that to the list --not only does it take so much extra time to get anywhere or do anything -- you get less time to do it in!! But don't leave out the "mystery" drivers -- the ones without a CLU!How to drive in snow, on ice, at night, in crowds, etc., Shouldn't even be on the roads, ya they're fun...and they LOVE TO XMAS SHOP OR LOOK AT "LIGHTS"... around this time of year... woo hooo I Love New England -- but I hate effin winter!!
There are times that the snow is beautiful on the trees and bushes (not on the roads), but the bad outweighs the good, so I would love to move from Michigan. It seems that every winter sucks a little more life out of me. I am just waiting for an open door to take me and my family out of here. I hate driving to work every morning on roads that have me gripping the wheel all the way. One bad thing about the warmer states is that crime rates are higher, because there is no cold weather to slow the bad guys down. Cold weather puts a damper on crime :O) However, there has to be a nice, sunshiney place with a low crime rate out there somewhere.
i hate winter cause you have to take out the trash in anything below 60
I really really hate winter. I get seasonally depressed every end of October. I miss sun and warmth terribly. I am a sunshine person and I feel like vanishing with every winter. We have rough winters here, that usually last up to 6 months. It's been extremely cold this year, with dozens and dozens of new snow every few days. There have been bad accidents, dead people, so I would like to see those, who love winter, as I would say SCREW YOU to them. They either must be masochists or mentally ill, as there is simply no pleasure in cleaning snow every day, freezing your ass and above all, having a nasty cold and sinusitis every few weeks! I have been constantly ill for last months. Can't wait for the summer. Everything looks different, there is optimism in the air. To make it worse, Slovenian winters are usually full of fog and clouds. There is NO SUN wahtsoever. It makes me so sick! In January this year we had 2 sunny days. For the next 12 days we are going to have snow mixed with rain, and a drizzle. You can't even drive properly, everythin is slowed down. I feel like losing 6 months of my life every year. I feel numb inside! The only solution for me and alikes would be to permanently move to a warmer climate.
flu. i hate it. scares me.
flu. hate it. scares me.
I LOVE your blog!! HA! I am just cracking up over here because I can totally relate to almost EVERY frosty nuisance here!!! Okay, and to whoever posted about the mysterious winter "ass rash..." THANK YOU!! WTF is that?? I'm always dealing with that; it's my newest winter complaint.
The feeling of being trapped in your house because it's too dark and cold to do anything productive. The inevitability of sheer boredom that follows being trapped. Having to wake up two hours earlier than in any other season just to shovel before work. Leaving for work when it's dark and getting home when it's dark ( there went that whole day). Cold floors! And my sour mood stemming from my sunless misery. I hate winter…
Post a Comment