Tuesday, December 20, 2005

#79 and counting...

Yes, my Scrooginess continues. Here we go...

#79. GETTING REAR ENDED IN YOUR OWN SUBDIVISION because the DAMN HOMEOWNER'S ASSOCIATION that you pay $100 A YEAR to for NO CONCEIVABLE REASON other than to PLANT SOME DAMN TULIPS can't come up with the funds to hire someone to CLEAR THE DAMN STREETS which contain 3 INCHES OF SOLID ICE!!!!!!!!
#78. Shopping with a 19 month old. Anywhere. Anytime. But especially in stores so overpacked with merchandise that the aisles are .00001 micrometers wider than the sides of your shopping cart, and said 19 month old is capable of pulling down breakable items with both arms simultaneously
#77. Creepy friends-of-friends-of-friends at holiday parties
#76. Spending 5x more per person on everyone in your department at work than they spent on you
#75. Waiting to get your annual review at work (today) which will dictate whether #76 is really an issue, or whether you no longer care because you have a nice bonus in your pocket
#74. RADIO STATIONS THAT INSIST ON PLAYING "MY FAVORITE THINGS" FROM "THE SOUND OF MUSIC" AND TRYING TO PASS IT OFF AS A CHRISTMAS SONG. IT'S NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes it mentions snowflakes and packages but it also mentions dog bites, attacking bees, depression, rain, and SCHNITZEL WITH NOODLES. NOT CHRISTMAS!!!!!
#73. Any Christmas songs sung by Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, any female pop star from 1985-present (please leave Christmas song singing to Karen Carpenter and good ol' boys like Burl Ives and Johnny I-still-can't-accept-that-he's-gay-Mathis)
#72. The silver candy ball thingies that people use to decorate Christmas cookies. I don't trust 'em. God didn't intend for us to eat silver balls. Interpret that as you wish, perverts.
#71. Eggnog. Bleggh.
#70. Shutting your scarf end in the car door and not realizing it til you start walking awayyyyaggggkkkkkk.

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